


Candy from Strangers (or booze from hot girls)

by TardisIsTheOnlyWayToTravel



Series: Supernatural Comment-fic Collection [8]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: AU post-5.08, Crack, Gen, commentfic, high!Dean, slight Dean/Castiel - Freeform, this is your brain on drugs
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-08-03
Updated: 2011-08-03
Packaged: 2017-10-22 04:18:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 684
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/233664
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TardisIsTheOnlyWayToTravel/pseuds/TardisIsTheOnlyWayToTravel
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dean discovers that hot chicks at bars can be witches, Sam is confused and slightly disturbed, Gabriel has some things to say and a packet of M&Ms, and Castiel is... uncomfortable.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Candy from Strangers (or booze from hot girls)

When Sam had left Dean, his brother had been chatting up an attractive woman at the bar, so he wasn't expecting Dean to be back so early.

Sam raised his eyebrows as the door burst open and Dean stood there, wild-eyed.

"Dean?" Sam half-asked.

"He gave me booze!" Dean cried. "Did he take a sip? I can't remember." Sam's brother looked appalled. "Or maybe it was the chocolate!"

He paused to point his finger at Sam sternly, expression suddenly severe.

"Don't take candy from strangers!"

"Uh..." ...what the _hell?_

"Oh, _honestly._ "

Someone shoved Dean into the motel room, and as he stumbled forwards Gabriel walked in behind him, rolling his eyes.

" _Gabriel?_ " Sam asked in disbelief.

"Hey there, Sam-a-lam," the archangel responded, forcibly guiding Dean to a seat and pushing him down into it. " _Sit, you moron._ Yeah. It wasn't me, by the way. Your brother needs to learn that just because a girl is hot, does _not_ mean she can't be a witch."

None of this made sense.

"What are you _doing_ here?" Sam demanded, suspicious and bewildered.

"I felt this inexplicable urge to be helpful," Gabriel explained, sitting on the edge of the table. "I know, totally out of character. But sometimes you've just gotta walk on the wild side."

Sam just blinked, still utterly confused. He stared at the archangel for a moment, trying to work out what was going on here, while Gabriel brought out a packet of M&Ms and started munching on them.

"Seriously, Gabriel - why are you here?" Sam asked more quietly, as Gabriel kindly handed a handful of M&Ms to Dean. "And stop feeding my brother M&Ms."

Gabriel shrugged.

"Well, you guys are so unbearably hopeless at, well, practically everything, that I figured it was the part of a charitable guy to stop you fucking up the world any further." He held the packet of M&Ms out of Dean's reach, frowning as Dean still tried desperately to grab them. " _Bad_ Winchester. No M &Ms for you."

"Do I want to know what's wrong with him?" Sam asked reluctantly.

"Probably not," Gabriel replied calmly, wrestling with Dean to keep the M&Ms out of his reach in what seemed to have turned into a kind of game for the archangel. "Don't worry, it'll wear off. _CASTIEL!_ "

Sam winced as his ears rang. He wasn't at all surprised when Castiel appeared a moment later.

Castiel blinked in what seemed to be surprise.

"Gabriel?" he asked warily.

"Hold these." Gabriel stalked over and shoved the M&Ms into Castiel's chest. Blinking in confusion, Castiel took them. "And don't let Dean have any."

That done, Gabriel turned and clapped his hands together, ignoring the way that Dean was now pawing at Castiel in an attempt to steal/coax M&Ms out of the angel.

"Right, so, I might've have a change of heart, okay? I'm joining this sad, sorry little quest of yours. We're probably all doomed, but what the hell. I figure it's not like I can make anything _worse_ , and with my help you might actually _achieve_ something. Any questions?"

"There is something wrong with Dean," Castiel noted, looking increasingly uncomfortable with the way that Dean was sort of... draped over him, trying to grab the M&Ms out of the inside of Cas' coat while Castiel kept it resolutely closed.

Gabriel didn't dignify that with a reply, just turned to Sam, clearly making an effort not to roll his eyes.

"Sam?"

Sam stared at him for a moment.

"You actually want to help us?"

Gabriel gazed at him with a patient expression.

"Well... we could use the help, I guess."

Sam wasn't sure he bought Gabriel's words, but the fact was that they were pretty close to screwed, as things were, and an archangel's assistance would be really helpful.

"Great," Gabriel said happily.

"Gabriel," Castiel said urgently, "I need to to take back your candy. Dean is becoming... unduly affectionate."

"What?" Sam glanced over. "Ugh! My eyes!"

Gabriel's cackling laughter filled Sam's ears, as the archangel helped free his little brother from Dean's clutches.


End file.
